Kindle My Heart

Zine
Title:	Kindle My Heart
Publisher:	Live Oak Manor Press
Editor(s):	Gail Paradis
Date(s):	2004-2006
Series?:
Medium:	print
Size:
Genre:
Fandom:	Star Trek: TOS
Language:	English
External Links:
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Kindle My Heart is a slash Star Trek: TOS anthology published by Gail Paradis.

There were two issues.

front cover of issue #1, I.M. Mueller -- "In the center is a color picture of Kirk tenderly holding a very contented looking Spock. The faces are very nicely done, especially Spock’s, and I love how the whole pose is so tender and loving. The only quibble I have is the perspective. I couldn’t quite figure out, if Kirk is on his knees as he seems to be in the picture, why Spock’s body seemed to be on a lower level somehow, so that his head is resting under Kirk’s chin. But the background is dark and it’s hard to see the legs very well, so maybe something was lost in the printing. The cover also has really nice drawings of Kirk in the upper right corner and Spock in the lower left corner. These drawings seemed black and white at first, but upon closer inspection are a sort of dark purplish blue. (Can you tell I am not an artist?) There’s also a color picture of the Enterprise in the top left corner. Marianne always has interesting compositions for her drawings, and I like this cover a lot.

A Change in Rating, and Comments on Submission

From The K/S Press #82:

I have decided to raise the rating on my K/S fanzine "Kindle My Heart" from G, PG13 to R and NC-17. I've been asking all my K/S friends if they would like to read explicit love scenes between Kirk and Spock and I had a resounding yes! I got the idea for a romance zine from AAK/SA (All-AgesKirk/SpockArchive) where they only accept G and PG 13 stories. Don't get me wrong, I love explicit love scenes just like everyone! And the artwork! Sigh.... As of today I have one piece of artwork from an overseas artist named "karracaz." I asked her if she would be willing to contribute a piece of artwork for Kirk and Spock and she sent me the drawing within a week. It's sexy without being erotic. It might be the cover unless I get more artists. It's so lovely. It's in color! It's perfect. Just what I was looking for. I will gladly accept explicit artwork for Kirk and Spock for "Kindle My Heart"! I'm seeking stories where Kirk and Spock are only paired with each other. I don't like reading stories where there is a third party. I love angst, hurt-comfort, first time, AU, established relationship, and Pon Farr stories. I will not accept Mirror, slavery, or rape stories. I'd like the zine to have all happy endings. And they can be set in the classic series and all movies. I have two excellent beta readers who have graciously stepped forward to help read and edit the stories with me. I want to produce a really beautiful fanzine for Kirk and Spock. I just purchased a new DELL computer and Lexmark X83 printer. All set to go. Now all I need are the stories...smile. A little more about me. I have published fanzines in Due South (Fraser/RayV) and The Wild Wild West (for James West and Artemus Gordon) fandoms. The Due South zine is called "Even Steven" #1 and #2. The Wild Wild West zine I published is called "Nights of Wonder" #1 and #2 both SLASH. And a GEN zine for The Wild Wild West called "Spies in The Old West." So, I wanted to let you know I'm not new to zine publishing. I love the creative process of putting a zine together. And getting to meet some really wonderful fans.

A Later Submission Request

A submission request from The K/S Press #125:

An established relationship K/S anthology zine is seeking stories, poetry and artwork for Kirk and Spock. Rating can be anywhere between G, R and NC-17. Explicit artwork welcome. I am looking for action-adventure, angst, first time, hurt-comfort, established relationship, and Pon Farr stories. No rape, slavery, Mirror, death, bondage, crossovers, or third party partners. I want the pairing to be Kirk and Spock only with all happy endings. I'm partial to romantic stories. Stories can be set in the classic series and all movies. Original stories at this time. No stories already posted on the Internet. Stories can be posted on the Internet one year after fanzine is published.

Issue 1

Kindle My Heart 1 was published in 2004 and contains 124 pages. The content is rated G to NC-17.

It has a color front and back covers by I.M. Mueller and interior art by Helen and CAZ. Kirk/Spock.

back cover of issue #1, I.M. Mueller. Kirk and Spock on an IDIC symbol bed -- "I love this cover! It created quite a stir at KiScon and resulted in a mini bidding war. I’ve never seen anything like this picture. Kirk and Spock are nude in a loving embrace on a yellow bed in the shape of the Starfleet symbol, against a dark blue starry sky. What a great idea—the yellow and blue colors, the pose, the use of the Starfleet insignia, Kirk and Spock in love out among the stars. This is wonderful."

• Dreams of the Heart by Abraxisdragon ("What happens when James Tiberius Kirk—the tomcat of the universe who had bedded male, female, human and alien and had always walked away intact, had finally lost his heart; lost it to someone who never would, never could claim it… (He) started making the rounds of the lowest dives he could find. His sole intention was to get as shit- faced and mentally disabled as possible through the liberal imbibing of the oldest anesthetic known to the human race.") (1)
• Touch Tomorrow, poetry by Robin Hood (16)
• Soft Kill by Deanna Gray. ("Kirk and Spock both suffer from the same problem after making love during a planet survey. "His attempts at suppressing the pain in his head were failing. Dropping to his knees, he reached for the communicator. His arm hurt and stung as he grasped it. The grid was cracked. Flipping it open, Spock was relieved to find the instrument, while damaged, was functional. Blinking to keep his eyes focused, he was able to find a working frequency.") (17)
• Homecoming, poetry by Helen (95)
• Waiting for Night to End by Elise Madrid ("Spockʼs self-imposed exile comes to end when he feels his bondmateʼs presence in his mind after over seventy-five years of silence. "He pushed back the sadness that engulfed him whenever he thought of Jim. After seventy-eight years it had become habit, and almost easy. For what was sorrow compared to the black shadow of bitterness and despair that was his constant companion? Kirk had often remarked at Spock's innocence of the darker shades of human, and Vulcan, nature. He wondered what his lover would think of his solution to escape the ever-present reminders of that lost innocence.") (96)
• Ghost of Summer, poetry by Robin Hood (125)

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 1

See reactions and reviews for Dreams of the Heart.

See reactions and reviews for Waiting for Night to End.

See reactions and reviews for Soft Kill.

[art]: The covers are striking, both because they're drawings/paintings made by the talented I.M. M. whom most of us know and love, but also because they're color!

The front cover is very romantic and loving, and I liked it a lot, but my favorite of the covers is actually the back image. It has an unusual and impressive composition IMO. Kirk and Spock are wrapped around each other on a gold colored bed in the form of a Starfleet insignia, against the backdrop of a striking blue expanse of stars. What a lovely and extremely fun way to combine the gold and blue of Kirk and Spock and the best aspects of their lives, love and space. It really blew me away. There are two art pieces inside the zine as well. One is computer generated art by Helen and one art piece is by CAZ. (I'm not sure whether this is CGA or a watercolor painting to be honest). The one by CAZ is also color and quite gorgeous. A Spock and Kirk dressed in what could be considered night-clothes, or perhaps exercise wear, I don't know. All I know it's that the clothes are black and the boys are sexy! Kirk is the radiant, healthy-looking gorgeous man we all know and love, with a smile to light up the world! Spock is striking in black.

Helen's CGA is a nice image, but I'm not sure if it's the original that's too light or if the print is bad, but this doesn't do much for me. It's rather blurry. None of the other art is suffering from poor print quality in the entire zine though. It's kind of sad that this printing is bad, because the image itself is very nice, and it fits Deanna's story remarkably well.

[zine]: This is a beautiful zine, with absolutely awesome color covers, and spiral binding. The spiral makes it easy to read and I have to say that I just LOVE that aspect. "Kindle My Heart" is not as thick as many others, and doesn't contain very many stories, but the stories that are in there are quite long and written by three awesome authors. All three stories are good, and how often can you say that all stories in a single zine are well worth reading? Not often! The zine is also one column, and has blank lines between paragraphs. I'm sure Gail could have fit more text on the pages had she wanted to. I am a firm supporter of the double column format, but I've come to realize others are not. To each their own. That said—this is a wonderful zine, despite my misgivings on the column formatting, and it's most definitely worth buying, not only because it's got three absolutely wonderful stories and some beautiful art, but also because it's one of the less expensive zines out there.

[poetry]: I'm kind of picky when it comes to poetry.

Robin's "Touch Tomorrow" seemed quite bland to me when I first started reading it, but as it came together in the end, I found that I really liked it. Powerful words that grew on me. Helen's "Homecoming" was not one of her best work. I often truly love Helen's poetry, though. "Homecoming" was nice, but poetry really...has to touch me on a personal level and this one didn't really manage that.

The final poem in the zine is "Ghost of Summer" by Robin H. and it is a quite haunting and sad poem.

[interior artwork by CAZ]: I think this art is CGA. It’s a sexy picture of Kirk and Spock in tight black T-shirts and shorts, which perfectly illustrates the story it accompanies by Abraxisdragon. And we get to see Kirk’s stomach! Very nice bodies and pose. Interior Artwork by Helen: This CGA of Kirk and Spock nude in bed with Kirk on top of Spock perfectly accompanies Deanna’s story. Too bad the print is so light, because you can barely see Kirk’s face and his body fades into the background. It’s a very nice pose with a good choice of bodies.

Issue 2

front cover issue #2, Art by Caz -- "This artist is new to me, I think. She (surely!) has two creations in this zine, one of which is the front cover. Now I am most assuredly NOT an artist, as I think is clear when I talk about artwork that I like, but some pieces certainly stay with me and enrich my K/S experience. The cover of this zine is quite breathtaking. It’s an untitled piece, a cga I think. Spock is shown standing, facing Kirk, who is apparently kneeling in front of him. Their skin tone is amazing: glowing, maybe. There’s light on both their faces . Jim is naked and removing Spock’s only garment, pulling pale jeans down, revealing just a teasing glimpse of pubic hair...gasp! But, really, the piece’s power lies in Spock’s expression. He’s touching Jim’s shoulder and hair so-o carefully, we just know, and looking at him with a combination of wonder, devotion and just a hint of vulnerability.... Sigh! Jim’s expression in lovely, too. More assured than his partner, as we’d expect, but no less devoted and intense.... They are totally focussed on each other here and that’s the beauty of the artwork. Caz also has a smaller cga in the zine, illustrating a story by Shannon. We see a series Spock, in profile, facing an image of Kirk, which is mainly head and shoulders. Jim’s chest, at least, is naked. He looks preoccupied, intense, as if thinking furiously. The beauty of the piece lies in the fact that Spock is clearly remembering Jim in this way... He, too, is deep in thought. The composition of the picture means that we see Jim first: he is on the left, with Spock on the right. Spock’s face is lit, his features clear and looking inwardly at his memory. I love this piece, it is simple and yet complete, somehow.... Caz, if you are reading this, well done!"

Kindle My Heart 2 was published in 2006 and is 83 pages, spiral bound with plastic protective covers.

The art is by I.M. Mueller, Helen and CAZ

• His Golden Smile by Farfalla Caqui ("An aged Spock gives advise abut pon farr to his Vulcan student.") (1)
• Cruel and Unusual Punishment by Kira Nerys ("Kirk awakens to find himself in what is basically a large and well-appointed prison, but with no memory of how he got there or why heʼs there.") (5)
• A Mother's Suspicions by Shannon ("After the charges pertaining to their unauthorized visit to the Genesis planet are dropped against Kirk and his crew, Amanda visits her son on Earth, wishing to know if he and his captain are lovers, something Spock no longer knows.") (22)
• Tomorrow by Jenna Hilary Sinclair (36)
• Carnival by Jesmihr ("Kirk has been unable to deal with his grief over Sam's death, so McCoy invites him along when he and Scotty go to a carnival, unaware that there is a second reason for Kirkʼs distress.") (38)
• Blessing by Tah of Vulcan ("After Spockʼs fal tor pan, Kirk decides to go to Sarek in order to acquire his blessing for his and Spockʼs bond.") (65)
• Spring Wind by Robin Hood (72)
• The Bait by Kelly Reiger (82)
• Toil and Trouble by Farfalla Caqui (listed in some TOCs) ("Angered by Kirkʼs rejection, the Terran ambassador to Artocarpus hypnotizes him so that heʼll desire whoever he next hears playing pipes.")

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 2

See reactions and reviews for Carnival.

[back cover]: I really love this CGA on the back cover of Kindle My Heart. It’s in color, which a lot of covers are these days, and it’s a wonderful merging of both Spock and Kirk from the time of Star Trek: The Motion Picture. Spock is shown as he kneels on the sands of Vulcan, probably just hearing the whispering of V’ger in his mind, and Kirk is shown over him/merged with him, with just enough of his admiral’s uniform so you can see his white collar. The look in Kirk’s eyes.... You know, Shatner really acted. You can see so many thoughts in his eyes, and this CGA emphasizes Kirk’s need for Spock, how he is thinking of him. This is just beautifully done and very eye-catching. Great work, Helen!

[INTERIOR ART between pages 60-61 by I.M.Mueller: I really like this! Kirk is sitting on Spock's lap; his back to Spock, his hand on Spock's head pressing their faces close, while both their hands are...uh...on Kirk's manhood. Behind them, the stars as a back-drop. The bodies are a bit too muscular, but not too over-the-top as some I've seen. It's a sexy, loving piece. INTERIOR ART between pages 34-35 by CAZ: I wish this piece was presented larger. It seems a bit lost on the page. Never-the-less it's striking; bright colors and sharp images. We see a profile of Spock in thought and in the back ground a floating-type image of Kirk, bare chested. I really like this. As I say, I wish it were larger!

[front cover]: Wow! Kirk is kneeling (or maybe sitting?) in front of Spock, pulling down his pants. There is just a hint of Spock's groin showing which I find to be sexier than showing all. Spock is looking so lovingly at Kirk, one hand on his shoulder, one hand on the back of Kirk's head. The faces seem a bit young (to me) for TOS, so this could be pre TOS if one wanted toimagine that. The mood and colors of this piece are soft, soothing to look at, but erotic at the same time. Nicely done, CAZ.